Do you find yourself carrying heavy emotional baggage?
Wondering things like, “What if I hadn’t…?”
“What if I had just done this instead?”
“If only I had told someone…”
“What if I had visited more?”
Those thoughts can follow us like shadows, maybe you feel anger or resentment toward yourself for choices you made. Or maybe your heart aches over events completely outside your control, things that left scars you didn’t ask for. I know that feeling. I’ve been there too. And truthfully, I still find myself there sometimes. But each day, I make a conscious effort to forgive myself for the things I didn’t know, for the things I would have done differently if I had known better.
Forgiveness is often misunderstood. It doesn’t mean forgetting, and it doesn’t mean that what happened was okay. It means choosing to no longer let pain write the rest of your story. It’s about freedom. Forgiveness is something you do for yourself, to stop the past from controlling your present. It’s about finding your way to peace.
God’s grace reminds us that we don’t have to carry our shame, regret, or guilt forever. He already paid the price. He forgives us, fully and freely, and invites us to do the same for ourselves and for others. We’re not meant to live weighed down by our mistakes or by the pain others caused. We’re meant to heal, grow, and walk in peace.
You may be thinking, “That sounds nice, but it’s hard.”
And you’re right—it is hard. Healing isn’t a switch you flip; it’s a journey. Forgiveness is a process. Sometimes it requires reflection. Sometimes it means revisiting hard truths. Sometimes it means seeking help—from a trusted friend, a counselor, a faith leader. And all of that is okay. Asking for help doesn’t make you weak—it makes you brave.
You can let go of the guilt. You can release the anger. You can forgive yourself and others. It doesn’t mean you’ll forget what happened. It means you’re no longer letting it define your future. It means you’re choosing a life that values peace over punishment and your overall well-being.
**I am not a therapist, or counselor. The thoughts shared in this blog are based on personal experience and reflection and are not intended to serve as medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. If you are struggling with your mental health or emotional well-being, please seek support from a licensed professional.